Men are so pretty...

Have you noticed in nature that the male of a species often are much prettier than their female counterparts?

I noticed this when I came across two Mallards in our parking lot at work the other day.

The male has this lovely, bright green head and vibrant, yellow beak.  The female is mostly brown and white, with only a small patch of brilliant blue on her wing.

Why did God do this?  I suppose it's because the female of the species usually has to spend a lot of time with young.  She must blend into her surroundings to keep her and the babies safe.  The males, who go off to wherever they like, (possibly foraging for food to bring home to the family?) have lovely plumage.  I also think they are "pretty" so they attract female attention in the first place.  :)

I have noticed that I think this way about human males as well.  They seem to have the shinier hair and full, lavish eyelashes.  Their lips can be quite nice and their general face shape can be more pleasant than a woman's sometimes.  And their bodies have the ability to become much stronger and more muscular than ours, with less work in the gym.   (Obviously, all of these descriptions are not always the case with every man.)

We, women, often spend a lot of time on our hair and makeup in order to adorn ourselves with external beauty.  I've wondered if we do this because we subconsciously are trying to keep up with the natural beauty of men.  Interesting...

And yet, I have heard many men profess that they don't like it when women overdo their makeup and hair.  They think it looks fake and unnatural.  They have said that a woman who appreciates her natural state is much prettier to them.

I wonder if the male Mallard feels the same way.  Sure, the female has simple brown feathers and just a small blue patch to adorn her wings, but to him, she is beautiful, just as she is.

A Handmade Gift

When it's your birthday, there are few greater things than a thoughtful gift.  To me, one of those few greater things is a handmade gift made with love.  My sister made me a birthday gift like that last year.

She took a piece of old wood, painted it in colors that matched my decor, adhered an image of a young woman to it, and wrote a sweet saying about how "a sister is the greatest ally a young woman can have."

I knew exactly how she made it. 

Does knowing how a gift is made take away from the sentiment behind it?  I don't think so.  Sure, I understand the technical realities around what she did and how she gathered her supplies, but I also understand something more important.

I know that my sister made it with love.

That is how I see the creation of the universe, planet Earth, and all life that lives on it.  It is a beautiful gift from God.  

As humans, we love to argue about how exactly, technically this work was accomplished.  

Some people want furiously to believe that because we might be able to explain the mechanics of how the universe came to be, we can subsequently dismiss the concept of a creative being.  These people feel if we can explain things, we negate the need for what they see as a crutch, a child-like wish that a God exists.

Others fervently argue that to acknowledge some possible scientific theories is to negate our trust in God.  These people fear that accepting these theories is disrespectful of the stories and analogies they have heard about creation their entire lives.  They fear that believing the Bible used analogies in some places, like instead of a literal description of creation events, is downright blasphemy.

I disagree.  I think we can see the world through both lenses. This is how I see it. Science attempts to explain how God made things.  Faith, hope, and love attempts to explain why God made things.  People in all sorts of religions believe there is a Creator God who fashioned the world.  Many of them would say that God did this through, for, and because of LOVE.

The beauty and mystery of life is discovered when we embrace both possibilities.  I am not suggesting that all scientific experiments, theories, and ideas are facts upon which we all must agree.  They are, in fact, experiments, theories, and ideas.  Some ideas have been proven through repeatable experiments.  Others have not and remain as simply "ideas".

In all cases, though, I would suggest that no matter what science proves or disproves about certain processes, it does not make void the existence of God.  Personally, I truly believe we are made in the image of God (Genesis 1:27).  I truly believe that Jesus, the Word of God, is the source through which everything that was made (John 1:3).  What I'm not worried about is how exactly God made all of that happen.

I also believe that we, humans, understand this reality of the blending of the scientific and the spiritual in our own daily lives.  We know that our bodies come together to make children.  A very scientific, biological process takes place to develop that child in the womb.  We also know that children are made from love.  We do many things in practical ways for emotional reasons.  We can take technical steps for spiritual causes. 

We are the handmade gift of God.  I'm not afraid or worried or even all that interested in knowing what resources he used and what steps he took to put me together.

Love,

Katy

Facebook Breakup

Teenagers today are so used to living a large majority of their social lives through technological means.  I've known some kids who initiated new "romantic" relationships, conducted those relationships, and ended those relationships all through Facebook.  (Is it fair to put quotation marks around "romantic"?  I think so...  However, I do acknowledge that there was a time when new romances were forged through letter writing, so...)

That's not actually what I'm going to talk about, though, in this post.

Facebook and I have broken up.

I know that many people enjoy FB.  I did, too, for a while.  At first, it was exciting.  Facebook gave me the ability to reconnect with a lot of old friends and forge new connections with new friends.  I even have "met" a couple of great people who I have never actually met in person.  You know who you are. :)

So, I can't completely regret my time with Facebook.  But, like a bad relationship, it became toxic for me to remain in it.

Why?

1)  I started to not like myself.  I got so unbelievably sick of seeing my own face hover around every single page.  With the current release of FB, my photo sat next to an empty comment box underneath every single item in the news feed.  On my own timeline, the same was true.  I saw myself everywhere!  Beyond that, I was tired of my obsessive nature being fed by the FB giant.  I felt compelled to post new status updates constantly.  I was sick of my own virtual voice.

2)  I started to not like my friends.  I struggled to like people that I love, trusted, am related to, work with...it didn't matter who they were.  If I saw something they did that made me uncomfortable or if they expressed an opinion that chafed against my own, I was constantly tempted to unfriend them or, at a minimum, hide their updates from my news feed.  What is that???  I'm not like that in real life!!!  So, I asked myself why I felt that way online.  I think it's because the online world gave me unhealthy doses of two things.  Information and anonymity.  I could silently watch my friends comment and post photos and silently sit in judgment of them.  Maybe not everyone does this.  I did.  It started to make me even sicker.

3)  I started to forget what it's like to actually have friends...in person.  I spent inordinate amounts of time online.  Granted, not every single minute on the internet was devoted to Facebook, but I can admit I am one of those people who checked my FB account way too many times throughout the day.  Worst yet, I had an almost out of body experience recently when I realized that I was at a party, IN PERSON,  and I stepped away to check my Facebook.  That's just messed up.

4)  I started to feel unsafe.  I felt unsafe in a lot of ways.  I didn't like Facebook's ever-changing policies.  I found myself logged into locations that made no sense on devices I didn't recognize.  I felt weird about the fact that I had personal information and photos posted all over that thing.  Worse yet, I didn't feel emotionally safe.  I felt like I couldn't really be myself.  Just like I was over-analyzing the things my friends were saying, I am just as certain they were doing the same of me.  As a Christian, I felt like my love for Jesus or my morals and values became taboo and unwelcome.  I didn't like feeling like a second class citizen.  I acknowledge that no one can make me feel this way.  But, I did feel that way.  And I felt like Facebook was a catalyst for me to feel that way about myself and I started to see it as a bit of a hostile, online community.

I share all this, well, because I can.  Heck, it's my blog.  But, I share it because I need to remind myself of the reasons why I let it go.  This unhealthy relationship I had with Facebook simply had / has to come to an end.

I deleted my account on Friday, March 29, 2013, at 7:30 PM (or so).  Just like some sort of emotionally abusive boyfriend, Facebook assumes I'll come running back because I can't find something more satisfying.  After I deleted it, the site literally sent me an email that stated that, "Your account is deleted.  However, it really is only suspended for the next 14 days.  If you log back in during those two weeks, your account will be reactivated immediately and none of your information will be lost."  And all will be right in the virtual world again and you will thank me that I didn't delete all your pictures, Katy.  And don't you want to remember what you posted in 2007????  (Okay, I added that last part.)

Facebook functions within a crafty level of brilliance.  I swear someone on their staff took a Psychology class or two and have applied the science that it takes at least 14 days to break a habit.  They're banking on the idea that I'll give in and come back.

Sorry, folks at Facebook HQ.  I'm not going back.  Yes, yes, I did go back two times before, when we temporarily broke up in the past.  But, I have found the confidence and the strength to let it go permanently this time.

By the way, if you feel like being a super good friend to me, please remind me of this resolute decision if I start to sound like I'm wavering.

In short, I'm free of this social experiment called Facebook.   I couldn't be happier.

Love,
Katy